No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
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its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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