So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
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