i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
