I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
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