kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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