He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
being pregnant is like rehab
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
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