yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize