i just made my gag reflex go away.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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