my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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