Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Randomize
