Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
