I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
