He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Randomize