It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
she pinky promised me she was 18
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Randomize
