the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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