all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
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