I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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