Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
