Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
So squirting runs in the family.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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