So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
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