I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
