census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Randomize
