at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize