she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
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