What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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