My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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