She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
