I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
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