I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Randomize
