You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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