oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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