I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I AM VODKA MAN
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize