yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
