none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize