Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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