Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
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