I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
