You smell like stripper and shame
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
love makes seman taste better
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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