Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
