He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
