you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
You're earring is so big in my mouth
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
