Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Randomize
