My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
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