This girl is more easily done than said...
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
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