Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
