if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
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I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
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