do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Randomize
