During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
You ate ashes out of my bong
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
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