I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Randomize
