We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Randomize
