I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Randomize
